Crocuta

"Untitled" by Unknown Author

The soothing sound of raindrops meeting the roof, the vaporous flow of steam from the kettle, and the secure feeling the fireplace provided suddenly vanquished after the first detonation. The children whimpered following the blast, their wool cloaks no

longer comforting them. Parents tried to hush their young to little success. Sobs and the fading of the explosion hung in the air, and then silence. Another detonation, this time louder, closer. More whimpering from the children, soon silenced by

caring hands clenched over their mouths. Citizens anticipated their arrival, but not this soon. Not on such a peaceful day as this one. Hours before townspeople lined the canal, socializing and watching the steady flow of water under the blanket of

gray clouds. Rain soon engulfed the city, and the people migrated inside. But not the guardsmen. Sworn to protect the city, they remained outside the gates. Relations with a nearby city had grown tense after the canal was directed away.

Their crops had died, their people starved. As a last attempt to save their own people, and seek revenge, they marched to the gates with the finest armor and weaponry. Not soon after, messengers rushed from door to door, alerting the citizens of the

invasion. The townspeople bolted their doors shut and huddled with their families, awaiting what was to come. Another explosion. Even louder, even closer. What were they doing? Blasting their way through the layered walls? Leveling the homes and

businesses that lined the canal? Unaware, the family trembled in the now cold room. The only sound was the that of their breath, and the ringing in their ears that accompanied the dead silence. A few minutes elapsed from the last explosion. They

grew weary, holding their breath and then releasing it. Were they done? Or are they approaching? Beyond the window, a figure appeared. He stopped at the side of the canal, his back to the disquieted family. Male, cloaked, heavily armored.

The sword at his side, covered in thick, fresh blood, glowed. He gazed across the canal, scanning the endless facades of homes. No longer crying, the children dug their faces into the surcoats of their providers. They prayed the figure not turn his

visage towards their window. But he did. He looked through the glass, and into the eyes of the townspeople. He stood, watching them. No movement, no sound. Then, another earthshattering explosion. The house shook and the children screamed.

"Crocuta" by Whohead63

This is the story of Konvexen's death. Several months ago-- It was the shrill, monotonous complaints itaqi said that woke Konvexen that morning. This was typical. Konvexen got out of their shared bed, groggy and annoyed.

"Why haven't you moved out yet?" Itaqi would say. "You literally can't live here." He would shout. Konvexen was, frankly, getting tired of it. "I'm going to get the paper." Konvexen belted. "Don't come back."

Itaqi replied. Konvexen stepped into his minecart and teleported out of his obsidian den. There, he waled out from the vast, abysmal emptiness that is the Defiance Towers and toward the gate. After openning it and looking around, protecting

himself from the wind with his robe, he came to realize that no newspaper is, or ever has been, delivered in Orion. He began to shut the gate when he saw, just one house over, a petite girl in a purple outfit talking to his neighbor, Silverwill_JDK.

In the shortness of the glance he managed to see that the door was quickly slammed in her face. "How rude!" Konvexen thought, "He oughta make that right!" He continued glancing only to notice she was coming his way. He was

briefly excited, then he regained his cool. She approached Defiance. "Hello, are you interestede in learning about the Goddess?" she said. "The Goddess? What's that?" Konvexen

feigned. "Oh, she's awesome. Essentially, she created the universe and made men inferior. Want the book?" "Sure!" Konvexen grabbed the book and pretended to read through. Some odd words caught his eye,

but nothing he thought too long about. He bagan considering the possibility of a relationship with this girl. Based almost entirely on the fact her minecraft skin was feminine. "Cool book! How many did you make?"

"A few dozen." "So..." Konvexen started, without looking away from the book, "Do you have a church?" "Yea..." "How many did you make?"

"Like a handful." There was then an awkward silence. Konvexen was running out of ideas. "So... what's your name?" "Z0ya" "Z0ya? What's that mean?"

"I don't know. Do you want to join my church or not?" "See, I'm Konvexen, and I got that by picking a bunch of random scrabble letters." "Cool." "Yeah..." Konvexen was confused. She wasn't

interested in the origin of his name? He knew he had to try something drastic. "You look -- Good." He bursted. "Thanks, Konvexen" Z0ya replied, a part of her actually blushing. "So... um..." Kon

sputtered, twirling the belt of his robe, "Do you like wanna go to the Dim Angler... later... like tonight?" Silence. "So we can talk about the Goddess." Konvexen finished. Z0ya, trying not to

show flattery, said, "Um, sure. 7 o'clock?" Konvexen was astounded. A date? With a person! Not just a person, someone who identifies as a girl! Would he finally get to pop his cyber cherry? "YES! 7 is fine with me! More than fine! See

you there!" He slammed the door. (In her face.) His face was totally red, butterflies fluttered away in his stomach. A date. -<>-<*>-<>-

It was now 7 o'clock at the Dim Angler. The place was as busy as ever. Konvexen walked in and saw Seldomshock and Itaqi talking. Interrupting, he decided to chat them up. "Hi, guys! OMG, didn't expect to see you here!"

"Kon, did you leave my house yet?" "No. I have a date." "Is that related?" "Um.. no." "Ok. Good job..." "You're just jealous."

"Go away." Konvexen was mad. He was tired of Itaqi's shit. He banged the piston-table. "Itaqi! You're such a dick! You're a dick like 90% of the time! You should be focusing on Actual Orion instead of drinking here! Fuck you!"

Itaqi's potion fell and splattered all over Konvexen, staining his glittering armor. "You asshole! My skin! Make it right!" "What" "You fucking covered me in pot, you dick!"

"No I didn't." "Make it right, Itaqi! Fix it! Fix it! Obsidian Overlord noticed the commotion and decided the best thing to do would be to interject. "Whoa, Kon, calm down. I've got some

invisibility potion in the back if you need it." "Really?" Konvexen asked, "How many did you make?" Then, there was a ringing at the front door. Konvexen looked, it was her. He panicked and drank the rest of Itaqi's pot to calm his

nerves and walked back to his seat. And then she came up to him, and slowness effect couldn't stop his heart from racing. She walked up to him and said, "Hi" Konvexen reciprocated. It was all very intimate. Kon

covered his stain with his hand. Z0ya covered it with her hand too. Kon tried to explain, "I'm sorry. Itaqi, he yelled at me and he-" Z0ya leaned in and whispered, "Who gives a shit?" Z0ya then said, in a

hushed, nearly sexy tone, "I brought something to show you." Maybe it was the drinks, but Konvexen was suddenly aroused. "What?" was all he could say. She then took out

from under her dress a long, thin, plastic stick. "It's for sounding." she said. Kon, a little intrigued, asked, "What's sounding?" Z0ya replied.

"Ok, so I was thinking that you take this dildo here and gently push it up the length of your uretha. That's what sounding is. And while you do that maybe I could put a strap-on on and fuck you in the ass while shouting 'Attack on Titan' references."

Everyone in the bar turned ang gave a quick scream. "Oh my god. Oh god." Kon continued to mutter. Z0ya bent down to try and help him up, which was the right thing to do, and on the way down asked "Are you into scat?" and he kicked her in the face. Kon ran

out of the bar on all fours, tripping and falling twice more. Itaqi opened the door for him and he ran right out into the River Freedom. He was caught in the current and swept out to sea, never to be heard from again. -<>-<*>-<>-